Tress Way will be the Sooner's starter at Right Tackle when they face Tulsa Saturday night.
Norman, OK- Who says Kickers aren’t real football players? Tress Way may be one of the best punters in Oklahoma Sooner football history, but he is about to fill a role nobody ever thought he would occupy, Offensive Lineman.
Emergency medical personnel responded to In The Raw Sushi near the University of Oklahoma campus late Friday night. Paramedics on the scene told reporters that many members of the Sooner’s O-line were having a private, after-hours party at the popular restaurant when all suddenly became violently ill after consuming large quantities of spicy tuna rolls. University doctors on the scene confirmed that the player’s symptoms were consistent with those of patients suffering from acute Mercury poisoning, and that consuming large quantities of raw fish in a short amount of time could easily sideline seemingly invincible 300 pound linemen for up to two days.
Spicy Tuna Rolls could join LSU, USC, and Florida on a list of things that have kept OU from taking home a National Championship in the last decade.
Casualties of the fishy fiasco include nearly every backup offensive lineman on the team, as well as nearly every available option the Sooners had at right tackle, including Daryl Williams, Tyrus Thompson, and Lane Johnson. Though all are in good condition and will certainly recover, none will be available for the season opening contest against the Golden Hurricane of Tulsa. This created an overnight quandary for head coach Bob Stoops, who had to find a suitable replacement for the Right Tackle position in short order. Enter Tress Way.
“Tress is a kid who has tremendous talent, as you know,” said Stoops. “What most people don’t know is that he was out every day during the summer busting his butt in O-line drills, just on the off chance that he would get to see some mop up duty. I guess Saturday will be his lucky day, because he’ll see a lot more than that.”
Many may recall similarly glowing comments from Stoops on Way after the Junior had been voted team captain. Stoops noted then that Way was not your usual punter, but never filled anyone in on what was until then a secret dream of Way’s that only he, Stoops, and offensive line coach James Patton knew about. Patton had this to say about Way in an unreleased interview taken during summer workouts:
“Tress may be 6 foot 1 and not even 220 pounds, but he has the soul of an old lineman. It killed him that he never got to try out his true position in high school due his size and the fact that he went to what is basically a football factory in Union, so we let him work out with our guys during the Summer. He’s actually really good, he’d work in a pinch if we had an emergency. We even submitted blocking stats for him to EA Sports so he could use himself on the line in their college football videogame.”
Many in the room during that interview didn’t believe Patton until he pulled out his cell phone, which contained footage of the video game version of Tress Way (#36) manhandling 6′ 3″ 273 pound Tulsa Defensive End Tyrunn Walker (#94).
When asked if the video was an accurate representation of Way’s skill, Patton replied “No, he would’ve held that block until the Quarterback got rid of the ball.”
So as Sooner nation sleeps on the eve of the start of another football season, the fate of Oklahoma’s #1 ranking, and perhaps shot at the title, hinges on the very narrow shoulders of a lanky kid from Tulsa. Before retiring for the night shortly before 4 in the morning Saturday, a weary Bob Stoops had this to say to the small group of reporters who had flocked to his home to cover the breaking news:
“We’re going to be OK. It’s just Tulsa. I’ve really got to get to sleep.”
